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Default Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-05-2011, 10:45 PM

This brief article will be trying to discover the reason why Wiccans are so incredibly unattractive.

The question.

Are they fat and ugly, so they decide to become witches to get the attention they seek?

Maybe it is that reading Gerald Gardner makes these women crave Twinkies and Bon Bons?

Or could it be something more sinister is at hand?

At first glance it would seem to be patently obvious that these women are attention starved, so they turn to a fake religion made up in the 1950's by Gerald Gardner, in which they are the dominant prophets and teachers. It seems such a simple explanation. It's wish fulfillment. They get to pretend like they have magical powers and that they are beautiful creatures of a goddess, when in fact nothing further could be from the truth. They are summoning Satan's demons. I don't care if you Wickers don't believe in Satan, because he believes in you!

Maybe they all started out as beautiful women and reading Gardner makes them more ravenous than a dozen teenage boys high on the marihuana? At first glance this statement makes no sense. How could reading some fake magic book deform these women so horribly?

Through countless hours of labor at the Landover Scientifical Studies, we have come up with an answer that might just shock you. The results are astounding!

The Findings of the research.

Back in 2006 Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S. ran into this pair of young aspiring Wiccans.



Even then, you could see the wrinkles and fat folds beginning to rapidly take hold of these decent looking (for whore tramps) women.

Using advanced facial recognition technology, we have found them today.

The one on the left. A mere few years later, the results have been horrible to behold.




For the one on the right, time has even been nearly as unkind.



Do you think this is just a coincidence? Let us assure you it is not!

This picture was taken of a Wiccan girl who called herself Forest Godess in 2001.



Notice she is already growing the fat arms and ample gut she is trying to hide with her clothes and pose.

But look at her in 2013 in a psychology magazine!



The same principle works with men. See this fellow back in 2008.



He had obviously already been practicing Wicca for five years.

Look at his poor demon ravaged body today.




Findings:

Our scienticians have come to the amazing conclusion that in fact Wicca makes these people fat and unattractive. We have found that it's the hole that Jesus leaves in the soul that the practitioner of evil arts is trying to fill with peanut butter, ice cream and Christian babies.

The constant summoning of demons and handling evil familiars ages these women quickly as well. The image of the witch as an evil old looking crone is based on reality.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-06-2011, 09:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson View Post
This brief article will be trying to discover the reason why Wiccans are so incredibly unattractive.

The question.

Are they fat and ugly, so they decide to become witches to get the attention they seek?

Maybe it is that reading Gerald Gardner makes these women crave Twinkies and Bon Bons?

Or could it be something more sinister is at hand?

At first glance it would seem to be patently obvious that these women are attention starved, so they turn to a fake religion made up in the 1950's by Gerald Gardner, in which they are the dominant prophets and teachers. It seems such a simple explanation. It's wish fulfillment. They get to pretend like they have magical powers and that they are beautiful creatures of a goddess, when in fact nothing further could be from the truth. They are summoning Satan's demons. I don't care if you Wickers don't believe in Satan, because he believes in you!

Maybe they all started out as beautiful women and reading Gardner makes them more ravenous than a dozen teenage boys high on the marihuana? At first glance this statement makes no sense. How could reading some fake magic book deform these women so horribly?

Through countless hours of labor at the Landover Scientifical Studies, we have come up with an answer that might just shock you. The results are astounding!

The Findings of the research.

Back in 2003 Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S. ran into this pair of young aspiring Wiccans.



Even then, you could see the wrinkles and fat folds beginning to rapidly take hold of these decent looking (for whore tramps) women.

Using advanced facial recognition technology, we have found them today.

The one on the left. A mere few years later, the results have been horrible to behold.




For the one on the right, time has even been nearly as unkind.



Do you think this is just a coincidence? Let us assure you it is not!

This picture was taken of a Wiccan girl who called herself Forest Godess in 1997.



Notice she is already growing the fat arms and ample gut she is trying to hide with her clothes and pose.

But look at her in 2011 in a psychology magazine!



The same principle works with men. See this fellow back in 2004.



He had obviously already been practicing Wicca for five years.

Look at his poor demon ravaged body today.




Findings:

Our scienticians have come to the amazing conclusion that in fact Wicca makes these people fat and unattractive. We have found that it's the hole that Jesus leaves in the soul that the practitioner of evil arts is trying to fill with peanut butter and ice cream.

The constant summoning of demons and handling evil familiars ages these women quickly as well. The image of the witch as an evil old looking crone is based on reality.
Wow. These are clearly NOT the same people.

Where is the study report? Where are the reports of samples, procedures, and empirical data to back up this claim that Wicca makes people unattractive?
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-06-2011, 09:33 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
Wow. These are clearly NOT the same people.

Where is the study report? Where are the reports of samples, procedures, and empirical data to back up this claim that Wicca makes people unattractive?
The empirical data is quite clear friend - just look at ANY wicker witch. The fact is Wicker witches get bloated from years of baby eating and dancing with goats.



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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-06-2011, 10:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
Wow. These are clearly NOT the same people.

Where is the study report? Where are the reports of samples, procedures, and empirical data to back up this claim that Wicca makes people unattractive?
Most definitely not. The demon-ravaging has left them bloated parodies of their former selves. Trust a hateful atheist to be flippant about such misery!



Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-07-2011, 10:37 AM

This may be a shocking revaluation for you.

Describing someone filling a gas tank is normal and mundane to us, but try to understand what it's like if you never had the gift of sight.

You're able to see the Wiccans in their bulbous grotesque visages because you've always been blessed with the light of God and can see through their magics. To any other heathen, they look sprite, lean, and supple. Once the Wiccan falls into the "Easy Way" and just makes themselves look good through magics, they tend to gorge on whatever they like and en masse. Giving into Gluttony, Sloth, and Pride whenever they can.

So be wary, it's a fact that a woman's intelligence is inversely proportionate to her beauty... If you ever meet a woman who's both beautiful and intelligent... Chances are she's a powerful witch, or the Devil.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-07-2011, 10:17 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
The empirical data is quite clear friend - just look at ANY wicker witch. The fact is Wicker witches get bloated from years of baby eating and dancing with goats.
I sincerely doubt anyone who is not living in a third world village in South America and South Africa is eating babies. Some tribes in these villages are the only ones around the world who still practice cannibalism.

And what proof do you have of this anyway? You cannot even prove this is in fact what Wiccans do.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Redeemed Papist View Post
Most definitely not. The demon-ravaging has left them bloated parodies of their former selves. Trust a hateful atheist to be flippant about such misery!
If you go to my profile you can see I am not an atheist but I guess being agnostic would still put me in that category in your eyes. Those pictures are clearly not the same women in their "before and after" pictures. It is so obvious whoever posted this just took pictures of attractive skinny women and replaced them with random photos of obese women.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev.Dr. Six Fingers View Post
So be wary, it's a fact that a woman's intelligence is inversely proportionate to her beauty... If you ever meet a woman who's both beautiful and intelligent... Chances are she's a powerful witch, or the Devil.
I personaly consider myself a beautiful person inside and out and I think I am reasonably intelligent...does that automatically make me a witch or the devil? Even though I do not believe in either? I think not.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-07-2011, 11:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
I personaly consider myself a beautiful person inside and out and I think I am reasonably intelligent...does that automatically make me a witch or the devil? Even though I do not believe in either? I think not.
Rev. Dr Fingers is not interested what it's like inside you. Your status regarding bondage to satan is determined by your own words:

Quote:
If you go to my profile you can see I am not an atheist but I guess being agnostic would still put me in that category in your eyes.
For anyone interested, her profile is HERE
Quote:
Agnostic and loving it
You are an unregenerate heathen because you deny The Truth of God's Word —> He says one thing: you think something else.

He tells you how to worship Him: you disagree.

II CHRONICLES 15
12
And they entred into a couenant to seeke the Lord God of their fathers, with all their heart and with all their soule:
13 That whosoeuer would not seeke the Lord God of Israel, should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman.
14 And they sware vnto the Lord with a loud voice, and with shouting, and with trumpets, and with cornets.
15 And all Iudah reioyced at the oath: for they had sworne with all their heart, & sought him with their whole desire, and he was found of them: and the Lord gaue them rest round about.

©1611

No doubt you disagree with that sentiment (because it's so "beautiful inside" you). God responded to others like you in this way:

ZEPHANIAH 2
10
This shall they haue for their pride, because they haue reproched and magnified themselues against the people of the Lord of hostes.
11 The Lord will be terrible vnto them: for he will famish all the gods of the earth, and men shall worship him, euery one from his place, euen all the Iles of the heathen.

©1611

Praise Him!
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 01:07 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
Rev. Dr Fingers is not interested what it's like inside you. Your status regarding bondage to satan is determined by your own words:
For anyone interested, her profile is HERE
You are an unregenerate heathen because you deny The Truth of God's Word —> He says one thing: you think something else.

He tells you how to worship Him: you disagree.

II CHRONICLES 15
12 And they entred into a couenant to seeke the Lord God of their fathers, with all their heart and with all their soule:
13 That whosoeuer would not seeke the Lord God of Israel, should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman.
14 And they sware vnto the Lord with a loud voice, and with shouting, and with trumpets, and with cornets.
15 And all Iudah reioyced at the oath: for they had sworne with all their heart, & sought him with their whole desire, and he was found of them: and the Lord gaue them rest round about.

©1611

No doubt you disagree with that sentiment (because it's so "beautiful inside" you). God responded to others like you in this way:

ZEPHANIAH 2
10 This shall they haue for their pride, because they haue reproched and magnified themselues against the people of the Lord of hostes.
11 The Lord will be terrible vnto them: for he will famish all the gods of the earth, and men shall worship him, euery one from his place, euen all the Iles of the heathen.

©1611

Praise Him!
Obviously you're the one with the perverted mind when you think that "beautiful on the inside" would mean someting so vulgar. The expression means beautiful in the way that you are kind, generous, and a good person at heart.

Also, how is being an agnostic make me "bondaged to satan?" I do not believe such a being exists so why would I be bonded to him?

If being a heathen to you means I am able to think for myself, then yes, I am one then.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 01:52 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post

I personaly consider myself a beautiful person inside and out
Prove it. Either post a picture date stamped that says, "Hi Pastor Will" or send it to me confidentially at my email address in my signature. 100% confidentiality assured.

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
and I think I am reasonably intelligent...does that automatically make me a witch or the devil?
I'm afraid so, but you are posting here. That will get you on the right track faster than anything. I'll be praying for you.

John 8:43-47 Why do ye not understand my speech? even because ye cannot hear my word.
Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.
And because I tell you the truth, ye believe me not.
Which of you convinceth me of sin? And if I say the truth, why do ye not believe me?
He that is of God heareth God's words: ye therefore hear them not, because ye are not of God.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 02:22 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson View Post
Prove it. Either post a picture date stamped that says, "Hi Pastor Will" or send it to me confidentially at my email address in my signature. 100% confidentiality assured.



I'm afraid so, but you are posting here. That will get you on the right track faster than anything. I'll be praying for you.

John 8:43-47 Why do ye not understand my speech? even because ye cannot hear my word.
Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.
And because I tell you the truth, ye believe me not.
Which of you convinceth me of sin? And if I say the truth, why do ye not believe me?
He that is of God heareth God's words: ye therefore hear them not, because ye are not of God.
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I do not think I am a witch or the devil. Just agnostic.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 02:27 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
Attachment 17333

I do not think I am a witch or the devil. Just agnostic.
Definitely a Witch.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 02:27 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
Attachment 17333

I do not think I am a witch or the devil. Just agnostic.
Nice, but we're not there yet.

No date stamped sign saying "Hi Pastor Will."
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 09:16 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
"beautiful on the inside" would mean someting so vulgar.
So vulgar as what? They're not my words.

The Bible tells us that failing to support Jesus is the same as being aligned with His adversary.
Luke 11:23
Christians do support Jesus. We are alive because He is alive.

John 1:4 In him was life, and the life was the light of men.
©1611

He is more alive than we are; God explains it like this:

John 1:5 And the light shineth in darknesse, and the darknesse comprehended it not.

I don't know whose words dissuaded you, but obviously you're not following Him - agnostics do not accept God's commandments - and how could you? Evidently you have heard about them but in darkness you have no light to see. That is why you disobey:

EPHESIANS 5
6
Let no man deceiue you with vaine words: for because of these things commeth the wrath of God vpon the children of disobedience.
7 Bee not yee therefore partakers with them.
8 For yee were sometimes darkenesse, but now are yee light in the Lord: walke as children of light,

©1611

God has warned us.

God has identified our adversary:

I Peter 5:8 Be sober, be vigilant: because your aduersary the deuill, as a roaring Lion walketh about, seeking whom he may deuoure
©1611

Even with Him in us, our perceptions are meagre and dim - but at least we can see something: it will not ever be so..

I Corinthians 13:12 For now we see through a glasse, darkely: but then face to face: now I know in part, but then shall I know euen as also I am knowen.
©1611

..and we look forward to that outcome. There won't be any agnostics there.

That is how we know that you are in the service of satan.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 09:32 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
Attachment 17333

I do not think I am a witch or the devil. Just agnostic.
I don't know if it's just me, but I think you are going cross-eyed or at least developing a squint.

I'm sure you wouldn't have had that if you were Christian.

And I see that you are wearing stripes... women wear those to appear slimmer...




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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 09:46 AM

Aargh is this poisonous wilful harpy now trying to seduce one of us into fornication?



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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 05:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev.Dr. Six Fingers View Post
Definitely a Witch.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson View Post
Nice, but we're not there yet.

No date stamped sign saying "Hi Pastor Will."
It was taken with my phone before going to a bar with some friends and mine does not come with a time stamp. I was not comfortable with giving out my email so I just posted it here.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
So vulgar as what? They're not my words.

The Bible tells us that failing to support Jesus is the same as being aligned with His adversary.
Luke 11:23
Christians do support Jesus. We are alive because He is alive.

John 1:4 In him was life, and the life was the light of men.
©1611

He is more alive than we are; God explains it like this:

John 1:5 And the light shineth in darknesse, and the darknesse comprehended it not.

I don't know whose words dissuaded you, but obviously you're not following Him - agnostics do not accept God's commandments - and how could you? Evidently you have heard about them but in darkness you have no light to see. That is why you disobey:

That is how we know that you are in the service of satan.
Actually they were your words and they were misconstruing mine. You said "Rev. Dr Fingers is not interested what it's like inside you" but I did not mean literally like you thought I did. "Beautiful on the inside" is an expression, like I mentioned earlier.

Agnostics do not follow satan just as they do not follow anything else until there is quantifiable, irreputable proof (the bible is not this). I am agnostic because faith is a gift I have yet to receive.

How can I be "in the service of satan" if I do not believe in him?


Quote:
Originally Posted by Redeemed Papist View Post
Aargh is this poisonous wilful harpy now trying to seduce one of us into fornication?
I am not trying to seduce anyone.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 05:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
It was taken with my phone before going to a bar with some friends and mine does not come with a time stamp. I was not comfortable with giving out my email so I just posted it here.
A woman that goes out to the bar? How unseemly. I'm sure your father is mortified.

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
Agnostics do not follow satan just as they do not follow anything else until there is quantifiable, irreputable proof (the bible is not this). I am agnostic because faith is a gift I have yet to receive.

How can I be "in the service of satan" if I do not believe in him?
It doesn't matter if you believe in Satan. He believes in you.

Read this thread.

Agnostics: irresponsible, spineless cowards for Satan
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-08-2011, 11:29 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor William Nathaniel Sampson View Post
A woman that goes out to the bar? How unseemly. I'm sure your father is mortified.



It doesn't matter if you believe in Satan. He believes in you.

Read this thread.

Agnostics: irresponsible, spineless cowards for Satan
I actually went to a piano bar with my boyfriend and two other couples. There is nothing unseemly about spending time with your friends and listening to good music. I can assure you my father is not mortified by any of this.

That thread was insulting, belittling, and I personally found it a little ridiculous. You may think the devil believes in me but I do not believe in him so he therefore has no hold on me.
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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-09-2011, 02:11 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceandlove420 View Post
I actually went to a piano bar with my boyfriend and two other couples. There is nothing unseemly about spending time with your friends and listening to good music. I can assure you my father is not mortified by any of this.

That thread was insulting, belittling, and I personally found it a little ridiculous. You may think the devil believes in me but I do not believe in him so he therefore has no hold on me.
That's quite the sassy mouth you've got on you, woman.

The greatest deception of the devil is to trick foolish people like you into believing that he doesn't exist. If you continue on the path you are on, I can guarantee that you will find out firsthand that the devil exists and that hell is very much a real place.

As for your claim that there is nothing unseemly about spending time in a den of vice and iniquity - there is simply nothing in the Holy Bible (KJV1611) to back that up.

I Corinthians 5:11
But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat.

Ephesians 5:11
And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.


If you don't want to burn in hell for all eternity, I'd suggest that you quit spending all your time slutting around in bars and instead start attending services at your local independent Baptist church. Maybe there you will meet a Godly man who can knock some sense into you, since it seems your father has failed at that responsibility.


II Thessalonians 1:7-9
And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power



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Default Re: Why are Wiccans so fat and ugly? A study. - 10-09-2011, 05:57 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jedediah View Post
That's quite the sassy mouth you've got on you, woman.

The greatest deception of the devil is to trick foolish people like you into believing that he doesn't exist. If you continue on the path you are on, I can guarantee that you will find out firsthand that the devil exists and that hell is very much a real place.

As for your claim that there is nothing unseemly about spending time in a den of vice and iniquity - there is simply nothing in the Holy Bible (KJV1611) to back that up.

If you don't want to burn in hell for all eternity, I'd suggest that you quit spending all your time slutting around in bars and instead start attending services at your local independent Baptist church. Maybe there you will meet a Godly man who can knock some sense into you, since it seems your father has failed at that responsibility.
If by sassy you mean I dare to speak my mind then yes, I suppose I am sassy.

I am pretty sure when your bible was wriiten such a thing as piano bars did not exist then so of course it would not be mentioned in your bible. Just because something is not covered in the bible does not mean that it is then by definition base and evil; be reasonable.

How can I be "slutting around" if I am in a committed relationship with someone and have been for 2 years? Who gave you the authority to pass judgement over someone like me or my father considering we are total strangers to you and have never formally met you?
 

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